And.
Like black ink that smudges,
it spreads vastly, quietly.
And as sound travels.. it’s swifter.
It pollutes.
I breathe them in, knowingly- unknowingly.
Prickles, chokes.
Finding myself on my knees.
Arrows of evil flames
dashingly amusing.
Each time I release an arrow,
it lands not on the aimed.
Pierces the One, and many.
Dear God,
when I find myself condemning and cursing someone, or even, calling someone stupid,
am I not condemning and cursing Your creation, and calling Your creation stupid?
Am I not condemning and cursing You, the Creator, and calling You stupid?
Let me see,
the way You see the good in others.
Let me love,
the way You love the most hated.
The teacher who knows it all..
..or so it seems.
Maybe because she is single, a teacher, and managed to get master’s degree.
Yeah, the teacher who knows it all,
made us do notes and present them instead of her really teaching,
thinks that her answer scheme is supreme over all those books which have points we wrote,
made us copy corrections for tests (which is a perpetual waste of time when it can be photocopied),
was unable to finish the syllabus before our trial paper,
then scolds us for not being able to perform well.
The following two separate incidents which took place during Geography (Manusia) class.
Incident 1 (few weeks before)
Halfway while my teacher was elaborating on a point, she asked, “Mana tapak pelupusan sampah di Kluang?”
Someone answered, “Dekat Jalan Mersing ada satu…”
And thereafter, a few of them where “excitingly” responding.
I turned to my friend beside, Bao Ching, who was just hearing them talk.
I asked her in a mixture of both Mandarin and English, “Eh, what if hor, we simply make up a taman that doesn’t exist in Kluang, see whether she knows a not…”
She laughed. After having 13 months of lessons with my teacher, who wouldn’t?
“Faster… what taman?” I asked while trying to hold back my laughter.
“Um.. Taman Sentosa? Got a not?” Bao Ching asked.
I turned to another friend, Ann Ting, and asked, “Kluang got Taman Sentosa a not?”
“Taman Sentosa not in JB meh?” she answered, puzzled.
The next thing was…
“Cikgu, dekat Taman Sentosa ade satu!” I quickly told my teacher.
“Cikgu tau mane Taman Sentosa tak?” Bao Ching cheeky asked.
The teacher responded, “Hmm… Taman Sentosa… Yang dekat Lian Seng kan?”
And the two of them burst with laughter!
While I, did laugh, but also tried to hold back for laughing, simply because, I was having eye contact with her.
So I just said, “Ya.. dekat situ..”
Teacher thought for a second, and then said, “Kluang mane ade Taman Sentosa?”
I quickly looked at my book, and laughed quietly. And the other two of them continued laughing their heads off.
Conclusion: I couldn’t believe that she fell for it, thinking that she knows it all. I mean, kalau tak tau, cakap je la, tak tau.. Tak kan yang tu pun nak belagak.. Entah belagak pe pun..
Incident 2 (yesterday)
Note that all I said to the teacher was in a moderate tone, a bit serious, a bit jokingly.
She came into class, asked us to take out our Kelantan Trial Paper. Somehow, it came to the topic of a soon to come movie, 2012.
She said, “Mereka percaya 2012 ialah tahun di mana semua benda kat dunia akan musnah. Dekat Bible kata, 2012 ialah hari terakhir di dunia…”
Immediately, I said, “Cikgu, Bible tak kata tu la.. Mane ade Bible kata tu?”
She went on, “Ya, Bible kata…”
My Catholic friend, Tian Ru, asked, “Bible mane woh?”
“Bible mane? Bible ade satu sahaja..” teacher replied.
I can’t exactly remember what she was saying, but she went on and on that the Bible really said that..
I just said, “Cikgu, itu ajaran sesat la.. Bible memang tak kata macam tu.. Cikgu tak tau jangan cakap la..”
But she still WOULD’NT stop!
She said, “Ada orang yang mengkaji dan menyatakan bahawa Bible kata.. Mereka sudah buat kajian… (and a whole lot more of things)”
I was feeling so URGHHHH!
I said, “Cikgu, cikgu buktikan kepada saya la, mane dalam Bible ada.. Kalau cigku dapat buktikan, then saya percaya la.”
She continued on…
“Mereka pun percaya siapa yang baik akan hidup dan yang jahat akan mati. Bible kata, yang baik akan hidup di paradise…”
Obviously she ignored me.. cos like hello, I was talking so loud..
And like oh, she talks as if she’s a Christian who knows oh-so-much about the Bible!
After her last sentence, I was totally lost for words. Beyond my wildest imagination, she can just be so thick skin and keep on proving herself right, despite countless disagreements. I waited for her to even question if I’m a Christian, to be able to say that she’s wrong. But she didn’t.
I turned to my friends (they were looking at me all since I started defending) and in a shaky voice in Mandarin, said,
“Teacher don’t know then don’t simply say la. If its your religion, you also won’t like it what..”
They nodded and we started work.
Conclusion: With all due respect to her as a teacher, I do expect her to at least show some COMMON SENSE. People, whether teacher or not, should know that religion is a sensitive issue. You’re not of that religion, so at least be willing to learn more or correct your views about that religion. C’mon, just be open minded la!
I really really felt offended, I mean, it’s different from being offended when the offence is against me and when the offence is against my Creator, and the Bible, the very book where my faith is founded upon.
I was so tempted to make my way to the staff room after her period, confront her face to face, tell her nicely that what she said was wrong, and maybe, demand an apology from her to the whole class.
Yeah, I can go to that extreme. Hahha. But well, within me, I felt that I needed to seek a second opinion on this, ‘cos I am bad at drawing the line between a teacher and a student. So I went searching for Miss Chang! Hahha.
She told me that I was wrong in challenging the teacher (asking her for bukti) and that if I want to really correct her, do it the next day, saying that I went home and checked it out. She advised me not to attack the person, but state what the Bible truly says.
Came home, told my parents. Dad said to leave it, I’ve done my part in speaking out.
At first I felt reluctant to leave it. But thinking of it, I will, no matter how much I don’t want to.
Exams are coming, let’s work in peace, for peace.
Btw, I checked it out online about this 2012 thingy:
2012 Film
2012 Phenomenon
And I don’t know where she got the idea that it can from the Bible, cos her facts are really out!
Jamie Oliver.
Heard of him?
He’s a well-known chef who does TV shows, came out with his own magazine on food, products, and has written his own recipe/cooking books. (For more, click here.)
Beyond all that “he must be making lots of money”, I was really encouraged when I watched about this thing he started; Fifteen. Read on and click on the links to find out more!
Jamie Oliver combined two ambitions: to open a top class restaurant and to give disadvantaged youngsters the chance to gain professional training that would set them up for an independent, inspired and productive life.
Fifteen Foundation exists to inspire disadvantaged young people – homeless, unemployed, overcoming drug or alcohol problems – to believe that they can create for themselves great careers in the restaurant industry.
The Fifteen restaurants serve food of the highest quality made from the best ingredients: their kitchens are where the apprentices learn their trade, and their profits help fund the programme.
Fifteen’s philosophy is to learn within the actual work environment, from experts in the field, surrounded by the produce, equipment and dishes that they will work with and be inspired by. Gradually, their levels of responsibility increase with the skill that they acquire through this direct participation in a fully operative business. And with this grows their confidence and belief that they can achieve anything they want in their lives despite what setbacks they may already have experienced.
Well, Fifteen is one of his few other campaigns that are ongoing. Inspiring to see how far he has reached today, from where he was when he just started.
berlari.
When one complains about human rights abuses in Malaysia, many Malaysians like to claim that at least we are better off than Burma. That is however not true for Burmese refugees in Malaysia. They may have escaped the horrors of living under the military rule of the junta in Burma, but here in Malaysia they live a life of fear all over again. As Malaysia is not a signatory of the Convention Relating to the Status of Refugees, Burmese refugees do not have rights in this country. Because of this, they are subject to all sorts of abuses, both by the authorities and fellow Malaysians.
Forced to hide in crammed apartments or makeshift encampments in forests, refugees live in constant fear of being detained by the Malaysian police, immigration officers and RELA volunteers. When caught, they are often abused, extorted for money, or sent to overcrowded and unhygienic detention centres. Sometimes they are even sold to human traffickers as slave labour or prostitutes. As the deplorable situation of Burmese refugees in Malaysia gains international attention, it’s high time for us to examine the human suffering we are causing.
ALARMING FACTS ABOUT BURMESE REFUGEES IN MALAYSIA
Burmese refugees and asylum seekers started running to Malaysia more than 20 years ago and the number has increased since then. Currently, there are more than 60,000 Burmese refugees registered with UNHCR but thousands more are unregistered.
Between 2002 to 2008, more than 4,800 Burmese were whipped for immigration offences.
In 2008, 812 Burmese children were detained in immigration detention centres.
In May 2009, two Burmese asylum seekers died at the Juru detention centre due to Leptospirosis, a disease linked to contamination of food or water. In August/September 2009, another six Burmese died due to suspected Leptospirosis.
In Malaysia, many refugees live in poverty. They have difficulties finding jobs due to their illegal status. Even when they can find jobs, they are usually underpaid and vulnerable to abuse from unscrupulous employers.
Refugee children do not have access to public schools. As such, generations of uneducated refugees are being raised here in Malaysia.
As refugees remain unrecognized by the Malaysian Government, they live in constant fear of raids, arrest and detention. Conditions in detention centres face continuous problems of overcrowding, unhygienic conditions, malnourishment and ill-treatment of detainees. Once detained, they never know when they will be released. Many have died in detention centres.
They cannot go back to Burma for fear of their lives, and yet everyday they live in fear here.
FURTHER READING
http://www.unhcr.org/pages/49c3646c125.html
Taken from http://www.running-suaram.blogspot.com/
Check out:
http://www.suaram.net/taxonomy/term/11
http://www.unhcr.org.my/project/unhcr/theme/images/swf/refugeesinmsia.swf
So much, for CHANGE.
Yeah, the who-ha(s) about the voting for the change of time of church service is “da” hottest topic of today.
Not to look down on anyone, or criticize, or be sarcastic on anyone, or making this a big big fat issue, but just some thoughts that we (including myself), could think about, how we can go from here, and lessons we ought to learn through this for the future.
Just a little flashback of events before this:
The church leaders gathered for a leader’s retreat. During that retreat, it was suggested by a young working adult that our church service time should be changed for a later time, 10.30 am. Then, it was announced to the congregation about this suggestion. Today, a vote was taken.
The main reason for this suggestion was because the young working adults found it hard to invite their non-Christian friends/colleagues to church.
“Working six days a week, having only Sundays as their rest day, being able to sleep in a little more, and yet, having to go to your church service which I don’t even know for what?”
Okay, maybe their friends didn’t say it that straight forward, but a simple “Huh, so early ah?” gives a hint.
Well, you might be thinking, why must we give way just for the young working adults? And then me leh? How? What about LYPG, CG, games? So rushing…
Relax, relax, rolex, rolex…
Put aside your worries a little while, take a deep breath and read on.
Why must we give way just for the young working adults?
1. To be relevant to the community.
If changing the time can touch lives and impact communities and lead people to the Light, then why not?
2. Cos it’s not just for the young working adults!
Hahaha. It’s also to cater to young families with kids (who sometimes are just so hard to wake them up), for those in the band, and for us, youth, to invite our friends to church. We don’t want “too early” or “I want to sleep” to be the reason for them not living in the Light.
3. Sustainability.
We, youth, come and go. But the ones that will stay put are the adults and young adults. The change of time is not just your our period of stay here, but it’s for a long run. Well, we wouldn’t want our church to be an aging society in God’s Kingdom, do we?
Back to the worries of our tight Sunday schedule..
There’s a reason why Jesus told His disciples, “O ye of little faith.”
If by faith we can move mountains,
by faith, we can make adjustments.
And yes, we have the right to vote,
we have the right to decide,
we have the right to make our stands,
we have the right to blame the leadership for poor planning,
we have the right to be disappointed by how some people reacted.
We can have all the rights we could ever think of in this world.
But how right, are our rights?
Jesus, had every right to condemn those who spat on Him, whipped Him, mocked Him, and nailed Him to the cross.
But yet, He chose not to have that right.
He chose not to have that right.
And He was right, not to have that right.
(I know you had to read that twice, right? 
)
To conclude,
what happened today was just a reminder for me (and maybe you) that I may have the right. But I need to ask the Right One if my rights are really right.
And, if I want to change the world, or change Kluang, I need to change the way I think, react, and… change church service time? Hahahaha.
That’s all folks!
Do feel free to correct my thoughts and words and add your thoughts! 
US and, life.
Just when we thought that weekends were breathers for us, it turned out the other way. We end up tired, drained, and sometimes unable to finish up piles of homework.
Just when we thought we could handle them all, of course, with God’s help, we accepted all those responsibilities. Not even half way through it, we wonder why we took them up.
Just when we thought life as a Christian ain’t a bed of roses, we never expected life to be a bed of roses, plus the thorns. We doubt, we ask in our minds why we need to care so much of our studies, when all that counts is our relationship with God.
Just when we thought of how much we cherish and appreciate our friends, we find ourselves too tired to do anything. Too lazy to ask, to lazy to start that conversation.
We have our weekends loaded with church related activities.
We go to school and come back with more homework, more chapters to read, and more events to prepare for.
Then we head for tuition, thanking God that tuition isn’t an everyday affair and start planning what we should do after tuition.
The next day in school, we wonder how come everyone else knows what’s going on, while we rush to finish our forgot-to-do homework.
At home we try to study, but sometimes we just don’t feel like it.
We tell ourselves that we really need to study, time is really running out.
We end up staring at the same first two pages for hours.
We get so irritated with ourselves; we run to our bed, bury our face in our pillow, scream and start crying.
We journal and talk to God, then eventually fall asleep.
Comes another day, we lie on our bed repeatedly saying that we don’t want to go to school.
Why go to school when teachers constantly remind us of the coming exams, when we really…. haven’t studied?
It hurts our pride, it messes our life, it gets us irritated.
There are days when all we want is just some encouragement and a ear to listen too. We get upset when no one cheers us up. We get frustrated when people care, but not to our expectation: when they tell us what we should do, when we think we’ve them all under control.
We get emotional and just feel like not doing anything.
And being emotional, really, isn’t a very nice thing.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve been through all those stormy and moody seasons.
And you know what, I’m still going through that now, but a slightly different one?
But I’m still surviving.
And barely.
Once again, reminding myself, to wait on Him.
His grace, strength and strength, and strength.
His strength itself, provides all that we need; sufficient, complete.
Today.
Wednesday September 30, 2009
Twin tragedies: Typhoon and tsunami wreak havoc
Typhoon Ketsana extended its deadly path across South-East Asia, killing 298 people and with the death toll expected to rise. Meanwhile, a powerful Pacific Ocean earthquake spawned towering tsunami waves that swept ashore on Samoa and American Samoa, flooding and flattening villages, killing at least 82 people and leaving dozens missing.
Dua andaian:
The first sentence is referring to myself.
The second sentence is referring to victims of natural disasters.
Today, I lied on my bed covered with a blanket, warm.
Today, I lied on a piece of cloth laid on the floor, shivering.
Today, I cried over my terrible trial results.
Today, I cried over the bodies of my loved ones.
Today, I wondered about my future education.
Today, I wondered about how I’m going to be a sole bread winner.
Today, I worried about my coming exams.
Today, I worried about my coming needs: my house, money, food.
Today, I asked for a ten ringgit note.
Today, I asked for a living child.
Today, I held my books in my hands as I walked to school.
Today, I held my deceased child in my hands as I walked to take refuge.
Today, yesterday and tomorrow,
He holds, held and will hold His children in His hands,
as we walk in the Light.
Two things:
When I hear of the troubles they face, my own troubles become minimized. Yet, we both struggle for survival in this world, in this life.
We both live in a world of difference. Yet, we have the same Father.
Two reasons to why this post:
My heart, goes out to them who suffered much lost.
My heart, goes out to my results who suffered much lost.
A cute baby was born.
All babies are cute. No one is not born cute.
E.g. Every baby you come across is cute.~Mummy.
Well, like it or not, I’m still alive, livin’ and kickin’ after nineteen years since 1990.
Hahha.
Yesterday on my way home from dinner with my parents, we got into a pretty interesting discussion about life. The things they said encouraged me, and I found myself affirmed.
It got me thinking…
Nineteen years of living, I think the greatest gift I’ve had in this nineteen years are my parents. Not only my parents, but their love.
Not only their love for me, but their love for God, each other and the people around them.
Because of their love for God and each other,
I was born out of purity, and not out of the wedlock.
I was held in their hands as a baby, and not sold to be in the hands of someone else.
I slept in a nice comfty place, and not left crying beside a rubbish dump, or somewhere in a dark alley.
I know both my biological parents, and not a third party.
I was raised by both my parents, and not single handedly.
I have both the love of my parents, and not abuse, or rape.
I have a loving family, and not a plate-throwing family, or a broken family.
My parents’ love, once again, is simply the greatest gift to me, when the world has much of its evil, immorality and ungodliness.
But, I don’t mind if they give me a digital single reflex camera.
Hahahaha.
On second thoughts…
Looks like we’re linking each other’s blog posts huh. Hahha. Funny.
But well, yeah.
Based on John Lim, Joel Yap and my posts on school and the persons involved, it got me thinking a few weeks back.
We all know (I expect) that teachers play a prominent role in the first fourth of our lives (based on average human lifespan).
Besides our parents, they come in second. We look to them with people of authority, we look to them with respect. They are our role models, our guide, our inspiration, our motivation.
We also know that like any other human, they have failed, will fail, and are failing us. We have high expectations of them, or at least, some expectations that is enough for us to feel disappointed with them at some point.
We acknowledge that. But at the same time, we know that playing their role well as an educator isn’t something too much to ask for. After all, they chose this job, and they are paid to do a good job.
My Dad, who is a secondary school teacher, once asked, “What do students want from their teachers?”
The answer for me, is simply… That.
And when they fail to fulfil their role as an educator, what do some of us do?
We get irritated, disappointed, frustrated, and sometimes, heart broken. We voice out, but our peers just don’t seem to bother. We wonder if sanity still exists in this generation.
We cry out, but not many hears us. We wonder if we are the minority who cares. Sometimes when we lay our head, we wonder why on earth we care so much. Why do we bother the fuss. Why take it so… seriously? And, does it really matter?
At least, I go through these series of thoughts and wonders.
Like Joel and John, I seek to speak out for what is right and just.
At the same time, I’m Muffled.
So much to say, but so little that makes sense.
Speaking out, creates awareness. And then? What next?
If there’s so much to say, but yet nothing done, have I failed?
If I have seen, felt, experienced, heard the injustice and wrongs… Why not I become a teacher?
If I know how a role of a teacher should be played… Why not I become a teacher?
If I want to impact and influence lives, and change the perspective of students towards education, the school and teachers… Why not I become a teacher?
If I say it’s about calling, then why do I care so much for what’s happening in school?
If I say it’s about calling, then are we questioning the call God gave all of us as salt and light of the world?
Do I dare to make a difference?
Do I dare to choose to be a teacher?
That at the end of the day, at least, I know I did something to save some lives of the future generation?
Honestly, I’m struggling within my thoughts.
Because part of me does not dare to choose to be a teacher.
Part of me is greatly discouraged to not be a teacher because of my teacher’s flaws.
Part of me is fear what kind of teacher I will turn out to be.
The future. Is uncertain.
And lives are at stake.
But right now, I know I need to do something more than just speaking out.
The search goes on.
And you, my comrade?
