US and, life.

Just when we thought that weekends were breathers for us, it turned out the other way. We end up tired, drained, and sometimes unable to finish up piles of homework.

Just when we thought we could handle them all, of course, with God’s help, we accepted all those responsibilities. Not even half way through it, we wonder why we took them up.

Just when we thought life as a Christian ain’t a bed of roses, we never expected life to be a bed of roses, plus the thorns. We doubt, we ask in our minds why we need to care so much of our studies, when all that counts is our relationship with God.

Just when we thought of how much we cherish and appreciate our friends, we find ourselves too tired to do anything. Too lazy to ask, to lazy to start that conversation.

We have our weekends loaded with church related activities.
We go to school and come back with more homework, more chapters to read, and more events to prepare for.

Then we head for tuition, thanking God that tuition isn’t an everyday affair and start planning what we should do after tuition.

The next day in school, we wonder how come everyone else knows what’s going on, while we rush to finish our forgot-to-do homework.

At home we try to study, but sometimes we just don’t feel like it.
We tell ourselves that we really need to study, time is really running out.

We end up staring at the same first two pages for hours.
We get so irritated with ourselves; we run to our bed, bury our face in our pillow, scream and start crying.
We journal and talk to God, then eventually fall asleep.

Comes another day, we lie on our bed repeatedly saying that we don’t want to go to school.
Why go to school when teachers constantly remind us of the coming exams, when we really…. haven’t studied?
It hurts our pride, it messes our life, it gets us irritated.

There are days when all we want is just some encouragement and a ear to listen too. We get upset when no one cheers us up. We get frustrated when people care, but not to our expectation: when they tell us what we should do, when we think we’ve them all under control.

We get emotional and just feel like not doing anything.

And being emotional, really, isn’t a very nice thing.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve been through all those stormy and moody seasons.

And you know what, I’m still going through that now, but a slightly different one?

But I’m still surviving.

And barely.

Once again, reminding myself, to wait on Him.

His grace, strength and strength, and strength.

His strength itself, provides all that we need; sufficient, complete.


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